Today is my birthday. In 30 minutes I will be those years and one more day older. I am sitting here counting my blessings. I have so many.
Despite everything that's happening right now, I consider myself pretty lucky.
Last week I was counting my regrets. I do that from time to time. Thinking of the things I would of changed along the way. But I always end up back here in the same place. And the truth of the matter is I couldn't change anything without it ultimately changing my life.
Everything I am, everything I've become -- the course of my life would change if I erased any of it.
I know this now.
When I left home 37 years ago I did not think about the events that would follow me.
I did not think about a broken heart,
or child abuse,
or sick sadistic strangers.
The world seemed so trusting then. And yet later these things would happen to me.
It would be a long time later before I would learn to forgive;
before I would learn to trust.
I am truly one of the lucky ones.
I am blessed.
I am a survivor.
I count my regrets only to remind me of how lucky I am.
My blessings are so many.