Sunday, December 13, 2009

A Couple of Things

Today wasn't a very good day. I woke up a little before 6 am and spent all morning retching with dry heaves until I finally got sick. After 3 ½ hours of this I made my way back to bed exhausted and was extremely sore all over. I think I am clear of whatever it was. Lois seems to feel that it was the chicken we ate last night. I'm not very sure. It is hard to say what brought it on and whether or not it has to do with my health issues. I'm leaning toward the latter.
I was just thinking, I haven't been this sick in a long time. It is nice to think of it in this way. Despite all of my ailments, most of them have been minor considering the circumstance. I have not had to be rushed to the hospital in ambulance or had to be admitted to a hospital for any length of time. Looking back I would say that I've been very fortunate. My MELD score is still very low and I am still able to work. So I guess I got that going for me.


This journal is a year old this month. I want to take a moment to say Thank You to everyone who has been kind enough to stop by and visit and to all those who have taken the time to become friends during the past year. Your friendship means a lot to me and I am grateful to have met all of you. Some of you have found your way here through my other blog and others through the transplant network. There are also many of you who have been writing to me through e-mails and offering your support. Most of you have already been through the transplant experience or have had a spouse that has gone through it. Your encouragement and kindness to reach out and share with me your own experience has been a true gift to me and I thank each and every one of you for this. There is no way for me to describe how this makes me feel. I appreciate your kindness and all the well wishes.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

In a Nutshell

Lately I've been feeling sore. I never know when the pain will come. Sometimes I have bouts of it. Sometimes it is like jolts of electricity shooting through my body. It may be in my back or in my stomach. It may travel through my shoulders or my legs. They are usually brief, like they are subtle reminders of what comes next, screaming this is that. Sometimes there is no pain. Sometimes it is just an unrelenting tiredness that has no boundary. I must just sleep. Sometimes it is a persistent nauseating feeling in my stomach.
My muscle mass is slowly wasting. That means my strength is leaving. I am going to have to work on this. If I can do anything for myself right now then this is it. I need more exercise.
I haven't been writing very much because I keep losing my train of thought. I don't think it's terribly bad, but it is certainly more difficult. Sometimes I will be talking to Lois and I'll lose the words. I have to stop and think about what it is I'm saying. She'll ask me repeatedly what it is I'm trying to say and then I will get frustrated and tell her to hang on a second. This is a big worry for me. I don't want to lose my mental faculties.
My psoriasis has returned. I was hoping that I'd have my transplant before this happened. I'm not sure what to do about this new development because it takes a lot of time to treat it and it is uncomfortable. I was actually thinking about asking my doctor about trying the interferon treatment again to see if we could fight the HCV. I figured that if I was going to be miserable for the next few months then maybe I could give it a shot and see what happens. But the interferon has a nasty way of making the psoriasis flare up so maybe that won't work right now.
I realize that this post probably sounds kind of depressing. I think I'm a bit overwhelmed these days. Up until recently I've tried to keep my head on straight. And in all honesty I think I've been doing a pretty good job of it.
I hope to be feeling better by the next time I post again.